Seasons Of A Marriage

'Marriage' photo (c) 2008, David Joyce - license:

Happy 2012! One of the first blog articles I read this year concern turning a new year resolution into 10,000 “little resolutions” by Paul David Tripp. What he means is that we will have 10,000 little moments throughout the year to make a choice to act in faith or not, to act in obedience or not, etc. It’s a good read, so please read it.

It also reminds me of the book “What Did You Expect?: Redeeming the Realities of Marriage” that Tripp wrote on marriage. In the book he kept emphasizing the concept that marriage is not to be worked out in the big decisions/moments in life, but in every day decisions to love and honor your spouse with God’s love. So I want to dedicate my first blog entry in 2012 to my wife Wendy because I wish to love her with 10,000 little moments in 2012.

It also reminds me of something I’ve been wanting to write about. I call it the the “seasons of a Christian marriage” that we might journey through our lives, from immaturity to maturity. Here are the seasons:

Season 0:
I have a lot of love to give, and I’m looking for Mr./Mrs. Right

Season 1:
I love you because you accept me just the way I am, and I accept you just the way you are

Season 2:
You need help to change into a better person, and I will help you to make those changes

Season 3:
We are not perfect, and we both need to change to become better people in order to improve this marriage

Season 4:
I’ve tried very hard but I found that I cannot change you

Season 5:
I cannot change you, only God can change you

Season 6:
I cannot change you, I can only change myself

Season 7:
I have accepted that on this side of heaven, we will remain sinners however hard we try to change

Season 8:
The biggest sinner in this marriage is me

Season 9:
God loves you more than I can love you, and it’s only by God’s grace and power that He will use me as an instrument of His grace toward you in our life together